So anyway, days like this sometimes make me stop and wonder what the heck I'm thinking when I want to add another kid. Aren't the ones I have enough? The truth is, yes. They are. If we never had another child the three we've got would fill up our days completely. There would be more than enough blessings and triumphs, pain and frustration. Life would be great many days, aggravating many days (probably the same days, most of the time). But the truth is, I could have (and would have) said the same thing if we'd stopped at just one child. There would have been both wonder and aggravation in hefty doses, and we would not have been lacking in things we needed to get done that we never quite had time for. I could have said the same thing after number 2, as well. But that doesn't mean I regret for an instant adding number 2 or number 3. The good moments more than make up for the bad ones.
And do you know what? My kids feel the same way. I don't think they ever wish, even for an instant, that they were an only child (though I suspect as they get older there probably will be a few of those moments). Even when they fight (and boy do they fight some days) they adore each other. Brothers are awesome built-in playmates. My kids are best friends, and it's wonderful. And because they love each other so much they are incredibly enthusiastic about more siblings (one day when I asked my 5yo told me he thought we should add 17 kids -- 10 and 7, though I don't remember now which was brothers and which was sisters -- either way I thought he might be going a bit overboard). And whoever we add to our family will be loved (probably stiflingly so), and have the best built-in playmates and best friends.
Which brings me to the reason for wanting to do all of this. It's not about me, it's not about my family. It's not because I have things so together I feel like I should take on more (anyone who actually knows me would laugh in your face if you suggested such a thing). It's not because I'm such a great parent I feel like I should pass my wisdom on to more kids (again with the laughing). It's because, as much as my life could be complete how things stand, there are so many kids out there whose lives aren't complete, and won't ever be unless people are willing to step up, leave their comfort zones, and take a chance. Our family would be fine as it stands, but theirs would not be. Though I'm sure the blessings will be multiplied on all sides, for all of us, if we're blessed to bring another little one home.